Avoid being preachy when discussing effective giving. Instead of telling people what to do, share your own journey and what motivates you. Then, genuinely ask for their thoughts and what they care about. This approach fosters an open conversation and strengthens relationships, making it more effective than a direct pitch.

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Instead of asking direct questions like 'what's important?', prompt customers to recount specific, recent experiences. This storytelling method bypasses generic answers, reveals the 'why' behind their actions, and provides powerful narratives for persuading internal stakeholders.

Direct questions in sales or leadership can feel confrontational. Prefacing them with 'I'm curious...' completely changes the dynamic from an interrogation to a collaborative effort to understand. This simple linguistic shift builds trust, encourages openness, and turns transactions into lasting relationships.

The most crucial communication advice is to 'connect, then lead.' Before guiding an audience to a new understanding or action, you must first establish a connection by tapping into what they care about and making your message relatable. Connection is a prerequisite for leadership and influence, not an optional extra.

True connection requires humility. Instead of trying to imagine another's viewpoint ("perspective taking"), a more effective approach is to actively seek it out through questions and tentative statements ("perspective getting"). This avoids misreads and shows genuine interest.

To avoid guilt, divide spending into three buckets: 1) yourself, 2) causes you're passionate about, and 3) high-impact, evidence-based charities. This approach encourages adding effective giving without demanding the sacrifice of personal or local donations, making the practice more sustainable.

Genuine rapport isn't built on small talk; it's built by recognizing and addressing the other person's immediate emotional state. To connect, you must first help them with what's on their mind before introducing your own agenda.

To gain buy-in, guide people to your desired outcome through a curated series of questions. This allows them to feel like they are discovering the solution themselves, creating a powerful sense of ownership. They are more likely to commit to a conclusion they feel they helped create.

Your personal donations are just one part of your potential impact. By talking about your giving and inspiring just one other person to match your commitment, you can effectively double your philanthropic output. This interpersonal multiplier is a powerful and often overlooked form of leverage in doing good.

Frame philanthropic efforts not just by direct impact but as a "real-world MBA." Prioritize projects where, even if they fail, you acquire valuable skills and relationships. This heuristic, borrowed from for-profit investing, ensures a personal return on investment and sustained engagement regardless of the outcome.

For those who find networking feels artificial or self-serving, reframing the goal from personal gain to offering help makes it more authentic. Approaching interactions with a genuine desire to give value first builds stronger, more symbiotic relationships in the long run.