Effective leaders are 'sturdy,' like a calm pilot in turbulence. They validate their team's emotional experience ('I hear you're scared') while remaining grounded and confident in their own ability to navigate the situation ('but I know what I'm doing').
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Described as "absolutely unflappable," CMO Laura Kneebush reveals her method is a deliberate process, not just a personality trait. When faced with a crisis, she intentionally pauses, listens to understand all perspectives, thinks about the big picture, and only then creates a path forward.
In a crisis, the instinct is to shout louder and match escalating chaos. True leadership involves 'energetic jujitsu': deliberately slowing down and bringing calmness to the situation. This rare skill is more powerful than simply increasing intensity.
Brené Brown distinguishes two types of empathy. Cognitive empathy (understanding and validating feelings) is a core leadership skill. Affective empathy (taking on others' emotions) is counterproductive and leads to burnout. Leaders must practice the former and avoid the latter.
A leader's instinct may be to solve problems immediately. However, pausing to simply name the reality of a difficult situation and validate the team's feelings builds more trust and reinforces authority than offering a premature solution. It signals awareness and command.
In leadership, especially during conflict, you have a choice. You can be a 'thermometer,' merely reacting to the emotional temperature of the room, or a 'thermostat,' actively setting and controlling it. Great leaders intentionally manage the environment, calming panic or creating urgency as needed, rather than mirroring the ambient mood.
While consistency is valuable, emotional stability is more critical for leadership, especially in turbulent times. A leader with a stable, predictable temperament provides psychological safety and prevents team-wide panic. This mental health-centric view of leadership fosters a more resilient and trusting environment than simply being consistent with actions.
Refusing to discuss fear and feelings at work is inefficient. Leaders must invest a reasonable amount of time proactively attending to team emotions or be forced to squander an unreasonable amount of time reacting to the negative behaviors that result from those unaddressed feelings.
A defining trait of a true leader is their emotional consistency, especially during crises. By delivering bad news with the same calm, nonchalant demeanor as good news, they signal to their team that the situation is under control. This emotional regulation prevents panic and builds confidence.
Creative leader David Abbott would calmly read a novel before high-stakes presentations. This deliberate act of nonchalance signaled complete control to his team, managing their anxiety and setting a tone of confidence more effectively than any pep talk could.
True leadership is revealed not during prosperity but adversity. A “wartime general” absorbs pressure from difficult clients or situations, creating a safe environment for their team. They don't pass down fear, which distinguishes them from “peacetime generals” who only thrive when things are good.
