The goal of using a local phrase isn't fluency, but connection. Fumbling through a word shows you've made an effort to meet the client in their world. This act of trying is more appreciated than perfect execution because it demonstrates respect and a genuine desire to connect with them on their terms.
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When selling cross-culturally, it's better to admit you're not an expert. Do your research, but also state that you understand you don't live in their world and what you've learned may not be perfectly accurate. This humility builds more trust than pretending to be a cultural insider, which can backfire.
When entering a new domain, don't feign expertise. Build trust faster by openly admitting "I don't know" and explicitly leaning on stakeholders for their subject matter knowledge. This positions you as a partner who values their expertise, rather than an outsider imposing solutions.
The key to building deep connection isn't getting someone to say 'you're right,' but 'that's right.' The latter confirms they feel fully seen and heard, creating a neurobiological connection essential for trust, a technique applicable from hostage situations to management.
In high-visibility roles, striving for perfect communication is counterproductive. Mistakes are inevitable. The key to credibility is not avoiding errors, but handling them with authenticity. This display of humanity makes a communicator more relatable and trustworthy than a polished but sterile delivery.
True connection requires humility. Instead of trying to imagine another's viewpoint ("perspective taking"), a more effective approach is to actively seek it out through questions and tentative statements ("perspective getting"). This avoids misreads and shows genuine interest.
When people don't understand your point, it's often a sign that you are not meeting them where they are. Instead of pushing forward impatiently, you must go back to their starting point, re-establish shared assumptions, or reframe the message from their perspective.
Genuine rapport isn't built on small talk; it's built by recognizing and addressing the other person's immediate emotional state. To connect, you must first help them with what's on their mind before introducing your own agenda.
Sellers often adopt an overly formal, academic persona when speaking to executives, which creates distance. In reality, executive conversations are simple, direct, and unpretentious. Drop the jargon and complicated words. Your goal is clear communication, not demonstrating your vocabulary.
Talking too fast (like a "New Yorker in California") isn't just a stylistic mismatch; it implicitly tells the customer the relationship is about you, not them. Adjusting your pace is a powerful, non-verbal way to demonstrate empathy and show you are willing to meet them in their world.
A simple act of pausing to ask for clarification when you don't understand something demonstrates genuine engagement and active listening. This small gesture can be more persuasive to a prospect than a flawless pitch, as it shows you are prioritizing understanding over just speaking.
