Talking too fast (like a "New Yorker in California") isn't just a stylistic mismatch; it implicitly tells the customer the relationship is about you, not them. Adjusting your pace is a powerful, non-verbal way to demonstrate empathy and show you are willing to meet them in their world.
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The goal of using a local phrase isn't fluency, but connection. Fumbling through a word shows you've made an effort to meet the client in their world. This act of trying is more appreciated than perfect execution because it demonstrates respect and a genuine desire to connect with them on their terms.
The foundation of clear communication isn't eloquence but active listening. The goal is to understand the other person's perspective before formulating a response, which also helps prevent reactive, stress-induced replies and makes others feel heard.
While not always politically correct to admit, a strong accent can be an initial barrier because it forces the prospect to focus more on understanding the words than on the value being communicated. The solution isn't to eliminate the accent, but to compensate by slowing down and enunciating clearly.
Top salespeople aren't afraid to pause a prospect to ask for clarification. While many fear this appears rude or unintelligent, it actually demonstrates deep engagement and the confidence to control the conversation. This micro-skill prevents fatal misunderstandings and ensures alignment before moving forward.
True connection requires humility. Instead of trying to imagine another's viewpoint ("perspective taking"), a more effective approach is to actively seek it out through questions and tentative statements ("perspective getting"). This avoids misreads and shows genuine interest.
When people don't understand your point, it's often a sign that you are not meeting them where they are. Instead of pushing forward impatiently, you must go back to their starting point, re-establish shared assumptions, or reframe the message from their perspective.
Genuine rapport isn't built on small talk; it's built by recognizing and addressing the other person's immediate emotional state. To connect, you must first help them with what's on their mind before introducing your own agenda.
Salespeople often adopt a higher-pitched, strained voice, believing it sounds more professional. However, listeners perceive this as inauthentic and untrustworthy, causing them to subconsciously disengage. True connection comes from a natural, relaxed tone, as your voice is an 'instrument of the heart' that reveals your genuine state.
A simple act of pausing to ask for clarification when you don't understand something demonstrates genuine engagement and active listening. This small gesture can be more persuasive to a prospect than a flawless pitch, as it shows you are prioritizing understanding over just speaking.
To slow down a heated or fast-paced conversation, avoid telling the other person to calm down. Instead, validate their emotional state by acknowledging it directly, e.g., 'I hear you have a lot of passion here.' This meta-commentary creates space and can de-escalate the intensity without being confrontational.
