To give difficult feedback, use the Situation-Behavior-Impact (SBI) model. Instead of making accusations, state the situation, the specific behavior, and crucially, the impact it had on you. This approach prevents triggering a defensive, fight-or-flight response in the recipient.

A three-step structure for feedback: state a neutral observation ("What"), explain its impact ("So What"), and suggest a collaborative next step ("Now What"). This focuses on the work, not the person, making the feedback more likely to be received well and acted upon.

Leaders can reduce team anxiety and prevent misinterpretation by explicitly categorizing input. 'Do' is a direct order (used rarely), 'Try' is an experiment, and 'Consider' is a low-stakes suggestion (used 80-85% of the time). This ensures a leader's random thoughts aren't treated as gospel.

Feedback often fails because its motivation is selfish (e.g., 'I want to be right,' 'I want to vent'). It only lands effectively when the giver's genuine intention is to help the other person become who *they* want to be. This caring mindset dictates the delivery and reception.

Before giving feedback or answering a complex question, ask a clarifying question. This isn't just for the other person's benefit; it's a strategic tool to help you target your own response, ensuring it's relevant and concise.

To give corrective feedback effectively to sensitive Gen Z employees, leaders must first connect before they correct. The ALEG method provides a four-step process: Ask questions to understand their perspective, Listen intently so they feel heard, Empathize with their situation so they feel understood, and only then Guide them. This approach earns the right to lead through relationship, not authority.

Instead of trying to find the perfect words, preface difficult feedback by stating your own nervousness. Saying, "I'm nervous to share this because I value our relationship," humanizes the interaction, disarms defensiveness, and makes the other person more receptive to the message.

People are more willing to accept and incorporate feedback about traits they see as secondary, like being "well-spoken" or "witty." Tying feedback to core identity traits, such as kindness or integrity, is more likely to be perceived as a threat and trigger a defensive response.

Use the GROW model (Goal, Reality, Options, Way Forward) to structure coaching conversations. This simple set of question categories helps leaders guide their team members to find their own solutions, fostering independence and critical thinking without the leader needing to provide the answer directly.