The act of looking at someone's eyes—the part of them that does the looking—creates an unbreakable feedback loop of "I know you know I know..." This immediately establishes common knowledge, forcing a resolution to the social game being played, whether it's a threat, a challenge, or an invitation.

Most salespeople fear silence and rush to fill it, appearing insecure. By intentionally embracing silence, you reframe it as a tool. It signals confidence, gives the buyer critical time to process information, and, like a pause in a performance, can make them lean in and pay closer attention.

There are no universal cues for lying. Instead of assuming a gesture like crossed arms means someone is being deceptive, view it as a change in their state. This change is a signal to become curious and ask clarifying questions.

The most vital and unnatural skill for sales reps is listening. The key is a mindset shift: listen with the intent to truly understand the customer's core issue. This forces you to ask deeper, clarifying questions instead of just formulating your next response.

'Radical listening' expands on active listening by incorporating internal data. This means paying attention to your own emotional reactions and intuition during a conversation, as these signals can reveal unspoken truths and lead to more profound questions and insights.

In a high-stakes interview, the interviewee used a 'pregnant pause' and spoke slowly instead of using filler words. This projected thoughtfulness and control. In contrast, the interviewer's rapid speech and verbal fillers undermined her credibility and ability to connect with her subject.

Pausing between sentences signals a conversational opening and invites interruption. To maintain control and build suspense, use a "power pause" in the middle of a sentence, just before delivering the most important information. This creates intrigue and holds the listener’s attention.

In an intense conversation, especially with a partner, don't stop after their initial statement. Ask, 'Is there more?' When they finish, ask again. Repeat for a third round. This active listening process helps the speaker articulate profound truths they couldn't access alone, fostering deep connection.

Active listening can sound robotic if it just repeats back words. Deep listening is the next level, where you go beyond the spoken word to pick up on energetic signals and intuition. It makes the other person feel truly understood, not just heard, by acknowledging their emotional state.