Humans evolved to have different "drugs of choice" as a survival mechanism. If everyone sought the same rewards, groups would quickly deplete a single resource. This once-adaptive trait now makes us vulnerable to a wide array of modern, hyper-stimulating temptations.

Modern society turns normal behaviors like eating or gaming into potent drugs by manipulating four factors: making them infinitely available (quantity/access), more intense (potency), and constantly new (novelty). This framework explains how behavioral addictions are engineered, hijacking the brain’s reward pathways just like chemical substances.

Our brains are wired to release dopamine through social bonding via the hormone oxytocin. Addictions hijack this natural reward system, replacing deep human connection with a substance or behavior. A key part of recovery is reactivating this healthy pathway by moving out of isolation.

True recovery requires identifying and removing precursor behaviors that, while not the addiction itself, reliably trigger overwhelming cravings. For a sports gambling addict, this meant cutting out all sports media—not just betting apps—to redesign his environment for success.

The "disease model" of addiction is flawed because it removes personal agency. Addiction is more accurately understood as a behavioral coping mechanism to numb the pain of unresolved trauma. Healing requires addressing the root cause of the pain, not just treating the addiction as a brain defect.

A powerful definition of addiction is the gradual shrinking of a person's sources of joy. As the addiction takes hold, natural rewards like relationships, work, and hobbies fall away until the substance or behavior becomes the only thing left that provides a feeling of reward, creating a powerful psychological dependency.

Addiction isn't defined by the pursuit of pleasure. It's the point at which a behavior, which may have started for rational reasons, hijacks the brain’s reward pathway and becomes compulsive. The defining characteristic is the inability to stop even when the behavior no longer provides pleasure and begins causing negative consequences.

Psychiatrist Anna Lemke details her own obsession with romance novels, which began innocently but escalated to needing more graphic content, hiding her reading, and losing interest in family and work. Her story shows how any highly reinforcing behavior, not just illicit drugs, can become a true addiction.

Resolving a specific addiction (like alcoholism) doesn't necessarily resolve the underlying genetic or psychological predisposition. This 'diathesis' can re-emerge years later, expressing itself as a new compulsion, such as a sex addiction or compulsive eating, even in someone who has been sober for 20 years.