The act of looking at someone's eyes—the part of them that does the looking—creates an unbreakable feedback loop of "I know you know I know..." This immediately establishes common knowledge, forcing a resolution to the social game being played, whether it's a threat, a challenge, or an invitation.

There are no universal cues for lying. Instead of assuming a gesture like crossed arms means someone is being deceptive, view it as a change in their state. This change is a signal to become curious and ask clarifying questions.

The key to building deep connection isn't getting someone to say 'you're right,' but 'that's right.' The latter confirms they feel fully seen and heard, creating a neurobiological connection essential for trust, a technique applicable from hostage situations to management.

Engaging with scary entertainment like haunted houses is not just for thrills; it's a social tool for evaluating relationships. Observing how a friend or partner reacts in a simulated fearful environment provides clues about their reliability and cooperativeness in a real crisis. It's a low-stakes test of a person's character under pressure.

True connection requires humility. Instead of trying to imagine another's viewpoint ("perspective taking"), a more effective approach is to actively seek it out through questions and tentative statements ("perspective getting"). This avoids misreads and shows genuine interest.

Your physical energy is a key non-verbal signal of competence and reliability. Potential hires, investors, and partners subconsciously assess your energy to gauge if you can deliver on promises. Low energy can communicate untrustworthiness, causing you to lose high-caliber opportunities.

Building deep connections isn't just about asking probing questions; it's about reciprocal vulnerability. Super-communicators often volunteer personal information about themselves first. This signals safety and gives the other person implicit permission to share something equally intimate, creating a powerful bond.

Stanford's famous "Interpersonal Dynamics" course teaches a counterintuitive leadership principle: sharing personal vulnerabilities and imperfections doesn't weaken a leader's position. Instead, it builds trust and fosters stronger connections, shifting relationships from a mystery to something one can actively shape through authentic behavior.

Generosity towards employees and customers is more than just good ethics; it's a strategic move in the iterated game of business. It signals your intent to cooperate, which encourages reciprocal cooperation from others. This builds trust and leads to superior long-term outcomes versus a defect-first approach.