Directly confronting someone about a behavioral 'blocker' often causes defensiveness. A better method is to first demonstrate your own self-awareness and vulnerability. Then, ask for permission to share observations, which creates trust and makes them more receptive to exploring their behavior.

Daring leadership isn't measured by how much personal information you disclose. It's the learnable capacity to remain present and effective during moments of uncertainty, risk, and emotional exposure. Some of the most vulnerable leaders share very little personally.

Instead of trying to convince people of the importance of vulnerability, first have them identify their core values. They will naturally conclude that living up to those values (e.g., courage, excellence) requires them to embrace the uncertainty and risk inherent in vulnerability.

By openly admitting your inconsistencies while still advocating for a principle, you remove the deceptive claim to unearned status that angers people. This vulnerability prevents a 'gotcha' moment and fosters a more honest conversation, building trust and allowing imperfect people to advocate for important causes.

The key to building deep connection isn't getting someone to say 'you're right,' but 'that's right.' The latter confirms they feel fully seen and heard, creating a neurobiological connection essential for trust, a technique applicable from hostage situations to management.

True self-awareness involves publicly admitting your weaknesses. By openly stating what you're bad at (e.g., 'I suck at 99% of things'), you build immense credibility and trust when you then declare your strengths. This approach validates your expertise in your core competencies.

The popular 'warts-and-all' leadership style can be perceived as weakness if the company culture values a more traditional, stoic approach. Leaders must first assess their organization's unwritten rules of leadership and then decide whether to conform, subtly push for change, or find a new environment.

Building deep connections isn't just about asking probing questions; it's about reciprocal vulnerability. Super-communicators often volunteer personal information about themselves first. This signals safety and gives the other person implicit permission to share something equally intimate, creating a powerful bond.

In a crisis, the public knows no one has all the answers. Attempting to project absolute certainty backfires. A more effective strategy is "confident humility": transparently sharing information gaps and explaining that plans will evolve as new data emerges, which builds credibility.