For top performers surrounded by 'yes-men,' the most valuable friends are those who provide ruthless honesty. Like Jimmy Iovine to Bruce Springsteen, they tell you when your work sucks or when you're lying to yourself, which is essential for growth.

While acknowledging the benefit of having mentors, Herb Wagner has found that the process of being a mentor is even more educational. Teaching and guiding others forces a deeper understanding of one's own principles and provides fresh perspectives from the next generation, offering greater personal and professional growth.

A colleague offering honest, difficult feedback should be seen as an act of profound gratitude. It demonstrates a deep investment in your personal and professional growth, and having the courage to offer such 'coaching up' is a pivotal, though uncomfortable, opportunity for development.

Feedback often fails because its motivation is selfish (e.g., 'I want to be right,' 'I want to vent'). It only lands effectively when the giver's genuine intention is to help the other person become who *they* want to be. This caring mindset dictates the delivery and reception.

Mentoring is not just altruistic; it's a powerful tool for self-improvement. When mentees apply a senior PM's frameworks and encounter challenges, it forces the mentor to refine their models, plug gaps, and confirm which patterns are truly repeatable. It's a feedback loop for your own expertise.

Despite delivering excellent sales numbers, a sales VP was reprimanded by her mentor for being too task-focused and ignoring colleagues. The mentor's message was clear: how you treat people is more important than the revenue you generate. This highlights a focus on long-term character development.

A common pitfall for new managers is seeking validation by being liked. A great leader's role is to provide constructive challenges and uncomfortable feedback, which fosters genuine growth and ultimately earns the team's gratitude and respect.

After setting a 100-year company sales record, a salesperson was harshly rebuked by his manager for letting his future pipeline run thin. The mentor's message, 'This is not acceptable, not from you,' wasn't about numbers but about upholding professional standards, even at the peak of success.

Bret Taylor recalls that Sheryl Sandberg's greatest gift as a mentor was her willingness to give direct, harsh feedback. He realized that this candor, while difficult, is a true sign that someone cares about your career growth, as it's easier to say what someone wants to hear.