To avoid sounding performative, a leader's message must be anchored in genuine conviction. Audiences can detect a lack of authenticity. Before attempting to convince others, a leader must first be completely convinced themselves, as this internal belief is the source of credible communication.

There's a fundamental difference in how people build influence. Manipulative "political operators" collect allies for short-term, transactional gain. In contrast, genuine leaders invest in building deep, transformational relationships based on mutual trust and respect.

The most crucial communication advice is to 'connect, then lead.' Before guiding an audience to a new understanding or action, you must first establish a connection by tapping into what they care about and making your message relatable. Connection is a prerequisite for leadership and influence, not an optional extra.

Pressuring individuals or brands to speak on every current event is counterproductive. This external demand often leads to 'performative activism'—watered-down, disingenuous statements made out of obligation, not conviction. True impact comes from speaking on issues one genuinely cares about and understands.

Ethical communication is like translation; it changes vocabulary to suit an audience while preserving the core facts and meaning. Deceptive communication is transformation; it alters the fundamental story, responsibilities, and perceptions to serve a personal agenda.

To effectively lead through influence, go beyond aligning on shared business objectives. Understand what personally motivates your cross-functional peers—their career aspirations or personal goals. The most powerful way to gain buy-in is to demonstrate how your initiative helps them achieve their individual ambitions.

Influence is nudging someone in a direction beneficial for both parties and is built on honesty. Manipulation benefits only you and relies on deception or lying. Lying is the shortcut that crosses the line from ethical influence to manipulation.

The key difference between effective and manipulative communication lies in what is altered. Leaders adapt the vocabulary and emphasis for their audience (delivery), while manipulators change the underlying facts and narrative (message), destroying trust.

Instead of overwhelming people with logical reasons to change, persuade them by helping them envision a new version of themselves. Use stories and framing like "Imagine what it would be like if..." to invite them to try on the identity associated with the desired action.