Your choice of a life partner has a greater impact on your financial future than any career or investment. Financial incompatibility is the number one reason for divorce, underscoring that marriage is a financial contract at its core, where alignment on money matters more than romantic feelings for long-term stability.

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Deep connection relies on a shared “fun age”—a mutual understanding of what constitutes play and enjoyment. Whether it’s childlike pranks or quiet domesticity, having compatible fun ages allows partners to cultivate both levity and gravity, which is essential for long-term relational health.

Professional success and financial literacy, as seen in the case of lawyer Patti Asai, do not grant immunity from financial abuse. Societal pressure on women to secure a male partner can override their professional judgment, leading them to accept controlling behaviors they would otherwise reject.

Contrary to romantic narratives, men's decisions to commit are driven by a list of practical, factual criteria like compatible values, shared future direction, and productive communication. While important, feelings of 'love and connection' are not the primary factors that make someone the right person to marry.

A prenuptial agreement isn't about planning for divorce; it's about customizing the legal and financial terms of your marriage contract. If you don't create your own, you are implicitly accepting the default contract written by your state's laws, which may not align with your intentions.

Men often leverage their financial success as a primary tool of attraction in dating. In contrast, successful women frequently downplay their wealth due to a conditioned fear of being pursued for their money rather than their character—a concern their male counterparts rarely share.

Unwillingness to talk about finances is a significant warning sign in a relationship. This secrecy often indicates underlying money problems, poor spending habits, or a hidden lack of resources. Open financial communication is essential for building a stable and trusting partnership.

Instead of battling over individual assets, couples should first negotiate the overarching ratio of their post-divorce living standards (e.g., 1:1 after a long marriage). This principle-based agreement provides a clear framework for dividing assets and support, preventing fights over minor items.

Contrary to common advice, high expectations aren't inherently bad for marriage. They create a bifurcation: couples who invest enough to meet these expectations achieve unprecedented levels of fulfillment, while those who can't are often unhappier than couples from past eras with lower expectations.

Historically, marriage was a pragmatic institution for resource sharing, political alliances, and acquiring in-laws. The now-dominant concept of marrying for love and personal attraction is a relatively recent cultural development, primarily from the 18th and 19th centuries.

Humans derive more satisfaction from progress and growth than from a static state of being. The journey of building wealth—the striving, learning, and overcoming challenges, especially with a partner—is often more rewarding and memorable than the destination of simply possessing wealth.