When an employee insists a goal is impossible, reframe the problem with an extreme hypothetical. Ask, "What would you do differently if I gave you a $10 million check to achieve it?" This question shifts their thinking from "Can I?" to "How would I?", forcing them to build a creative plan and revealing that the true barrier was belief, not capability.
Related Insights
The human brain is wired to enjoy solving challenges. Asking "What puzzles would you like to solve?" sparks passion and ownership. In contrast, asking "What are your goals?" often elicits a feeling of obligation and a list of burdensome tasks, draining the work of its inherent meaning and excitement.
Many people talk themselves out of ambitious goals before ever facing external resistance. Adopt a mindset of working backwards from a magical outcome and letting the world provide the feedback. Don't be the first person to tell yourself no; give yourself permission to go for it and adjust based on real-world constraints.
To help your team overcome their own performance blockers, shift your coaching from their actions to their thinking. Ask questions like, "What were you thinking that led you to that approach?" This helps them uncover the root belief driving their behavior, enabling more profound and lasting change than simple behavioral correction.
When an employee presents a problem they should be able to solve, resist providing a solution. Instead, return ownership by asking, "What do you think you should do about that?" This simple question forces critical thinking and breaks the team's dependency on you for answers.
High-achievers often have a mental block against simple solutions, subconsciously believing that important work must feel hard. This prevents them from even searching for easier paths like delegation or automation. To overcome this, reframe problems from “How can I do this?” to “Who or what could do this for me?”
Solving truly hard problems requires a form of 'arrogance'—an unwavering belief that a solution is possible, even after months or years of failure. This 'can-do' spirit acts as an accelerator, providing the persistence needed to push through challenges where most would give up.
Instead of overwhelming people with logical reasons to change, persuade them by helping them envision a new version of themselves. Use stories and framing like "Imagine what it would be like if..." to invite them to try on the identity associated with the desired action.
Blaming external factors like a "bad market" or "no good talent" makes you powerless. Rephrasing the problem as a personal skill deficit—e.g., "I lack the skill to attract talent"—immediately makes it solvable because you can learn new skills. This puts you back in control of the outcome.
When feeling stuck, start with your desired outcome and work backward. Ask: What action is needed? What feeling enables that action? What thought or belief creates that feeling? This process quickly reveals if your current beliefs are misaligned with your goals, pinpointing where to reframe.
Instead of telling an underperforming employee they can be better, ask what they believe their biggest possible accomplishment could be. This coaching approach helps individuals discover and own their potential, rather than having it dictated to them, leading to greater breakthroughs.
