In high-control groups like OneTaste, the philosophy that you are 100% responsible for your experience was used to manipulate members. It framed any exploitation they suffered as their own fault, making it psychologically difficult for them to recognize or name the abuse.
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The popular concept of being a 'high agency' person is a rebranding of the 'radical responsibility' teachings from programs like Landmark and Tony Robbins. It's coded language for a belief system where individuals are powerful actors who shape their environment, rather than victims of it.
For any high-control group or compelling company to attract followers, its teachings must contain a core of significant wisdom or value. This makes it difficult for members to leave, as they would also be abandoning something that genuinely helped them, blending the good with the bad.
Western culture's focus on hyper-individualism leads people to feel personally responsible for solving massive, systemic issues. This creates immense pressure and an illogical belief that one must find a perfect, individual solution to a problem that requires a collective response.
The societal message that women should be quieter or less bold is a historical strategy for control. This fear is rooted in the perceived "safety" of conforming to unnatural, prescribed roles, making women believe the problem is with them, not the system.
TikTok's new 'wellness' features, which reward users for managing screen time, are a form of corporate misdirection. By gamifying self-control, the platform shifts the blame for addiction from its intentionally engaging algorithm to the user's lack of willpower, a tactic compared to giving someone cocaine and then a badge for not using it.
Overcoming trauma from a toxic relationship involves more than blaming the other person. A critical step is recognizing one's own role in enabling the mistreatment. This self-awareness, which speaker Patti Asai gained from an ayahuasca journey, is essential to breaking destructive patterns and preventing their recurrence.
People surrounding a so-called genius, like Picasso's friends or employees at cult-like startups, often tolerate terrible behavior. They rationalize the unpleasantness by telling themselves they are part of an extraordinary, history-making experience, which creates a toxic enabling environment.
OneTaste mirrored the tech world by holding corporate-style conferences with lanyards, positioning its founder as a visionary akin to a tech CEO, and promoting a world-changing mission. This familiar structure made its fringe practices seem more legitimate and appealing to a tech-savvy audience.
Our culture equates accountability with punishment. A more powerful form of accountability is making someone a co-owner in solving the root problem. This ensures the issue doesn't recur and is the ultimate form of taking responsibility for one's actions.
Constantly accepting fault to keep the peace—the "Atlas Complex"—is a trauma response that absolves others of accountability. It feels like responsibility but is actually self-betrayal, creating unhealthy dynamics where one person carries all the weight and prevents mutual growth.
