The "having a boyfriend is cringe" trend, promoted by high-status women, may be an unconscious evolutionary strategy to suppress the reproductive success of other women, thus reducing competition for desirable partners.
For hyper-successful women at the apex of their fields, the optimal mating strategy is to choose a partner from a completely different 'status game' (e.g., an entertainer marrying an athlete). This avoids direct professional comparison and competition, allowing for a relationship based on complementary, non-overlapping forms of prestige and competence.
Elite women promote anti-relationship views as a "luxury belief," conferring status on themselves while harming less affluent women, who data shows experience greater declines in fertility and happiness when they forgo marriage and family.
Data shows high-status men practice assortative mating, pairing with women of similar educational and economic standing. The "rich man marries the young, beautiful waitress" trope is a myth; successful men value partners they can relate to intellectually and who understand their world.
Men often leverage their financial success as a primary tool of attraction in dating. In contrast, successful women frequently downplay their wealth due to a conditioned fear of being pursued for their money rather than their character—a concern their male counterparts rarely share.
Beyond stated morals, a pro-life stance can be an unconscious mating strategy. By making abortion less accessible, it raises the consequences of casual sex, which disincentivizes promiscuity and helps secure investment from male partners in long-term relationships.
The speaker introduces "mate suppression" as a twisted biological impulse, particularly prevalent in toxic femininity, to harm the reproductive chances of perceived rivals. This drive manifests in behaviors that sabotage others' attractiveness or access to mates, explaining seemingly irrational social rules that secretly aim to handicap competitors.
People's conscious, stated reasons for their actions (proximate explanations) often obscure deeper, unconscious evolutionary drivers (ultimate explanations), such as the drive to reduce mating competition while appearing compassionate.
When desirable partners are scarce, people adopt an "inner citadel" mindset to protect their ego. They convince themselves that relationships are undesirable ("men are trash") to cope with the difficulty of the modern mating market.
A study found that men’s real-world sexual success was highly correlated with how intimidating other men found them, not by how attractive women rated them. This suggests female mate choice is less about direct selection and more about passively choosing the victors of intra-male competition, validating a 'male competition theory' of attraction.
A subtle form of female competition, the "bless her heart effect" involves disguising reputation-damaging gossip as an expression of concern. This allows an individual to subtly attack a rival while maintaining plausible deniability and a pro-social image.