Described as a "tractor beam" similar to Bill Clinton's magnetism, Oprah's technique involves physical touch and focused attention that makes individuals feel uniquely liked. This triggers a reciprocal feeling, creating an immediate and powerful connection, demonstrating that the fastest way to be liked is to like others first.

In fast-paced settings like professional basketball, verbal communication is too slow. Teams develop a shorthand of non-verbal cues and pre-agreed symbols to communicate complex ideas instantly, fostering the chemistry required for high performance. This model applies to any high-pressure professional environment.

The act of looking at someone's eyes—the part of them that does the looking—creates an unbreakable feedback loop of "I know you know I know..." This immediately establishes common knowledge, forcing a resolution to the social game being played, whether it's a threat, a challenge, or an invitation.

The foundation of clear communication isn't eloquence but active listening. The goal is to understand the other person's perspective before formulating a response, which also helps prevent reactive, stress-induced replies and makes others feel heard.

There are no universal cues for lying. Instead of assuming a gesture like crossed arms means someone is being deceptive, view it as a change in their state. This change is a signal to become curious and ask clarifying questions.

In high-visibility roles, striving for perfect communication is counterproductive. Mistakes are inevitable. The key to credibility is not avoiding errors, but handling them with authenticity. This display of humanity makes a communicator more relatable and trustworthy than a polished but sterile delivery.

Your physical energy is a key non-verbal signal of competence and reliability. Potential hires, investors, and partners subconsciously assess your energy to gauge if you can deliver on promises. Low energy can communicate untrustworthiness, causing you to lose high-caliber opportunities.

Deepak Chopra provides a tangible framework for the abstract concept of presence. It consists of four components: deep listening without judgment (Attention), empathy and compassion (Affection), valuing the uniqueness of the interaction (Appreciation), and expressing your view without attachment (Acceptance).

In virtual settings, the lack of physical presence causes people to "over-index" on the few non-verbal cues available, like facial expressions. A leader's innocuous action, such as rubbing their face, can be misinterpreted as negativity. Leaders must be hyper-aware that their virtual body language is under a microscope.