Every marriage has a prenup; it's either one you write together or one written by the state legislature. Forgoing a prenup means you implicitly trust future politicians to decide your fate more than you trust your chosen partner to have an honest conversation.
A prenuptial agreement is simply the set of rules for a marriage's end. By not creating your own, you automatically opt into the default "prenup" written by state law. This government contract can be altered at any time without your permission, ceding financial control to the state.
A prenuptial agreement isn't about planning for divorce; it's about customizing the legal and financial terms of your marriage contract. If you don't create your own, you are implicitly accepting the default contract written by your state's laws, which may not align with your intentions.
When one partner leaves the workforce to manage the home, enabling the other to pursue demanding "greedy work," a postnuptial agreement is critical. It formally assigns value to this unpaid labor, mitigating the significant financial risk and power imbalance created by the career pause.
Your choice of a life partner has a greater impact on your financial future than any career or investment. Financial incompatibility is the number one reason for divorce, underscoring that marriage is a financial contract at its core, where alignment on money matters more than romantic feelings for long-term stability.
A growing trend in prenups involves clauses designed to protect second-generation wealth. Parents who plan to leave significant assets or provide ongoing financial support are now insisting their children get prenups to ensure family money doesn't become divisible marital property in a divorce.
Laura Wasser warns against clauses that nullify a prenup after a set number of years. Courts can view these as "promotive of divorce," creating a financial incentive for one spouse to end the marriage just before the clause activates, which could potentially invalidate the entire agreement.
Divorce attorney Laura Wasser explains that while people request clauses about infidelity, weight gain, or even household chores, reputable lawyers refuse to include them. These "lifestyle" clauses are typically not enforceable by a judge, rendering them useless if challenged and potentially weakening the entire agreement.
While a prenup is negotiated in good faith before marriage, a postnup often arises from a marital issue like infidelity. This timing can lead courts to view it as the first step in a divorce negotiation, not a marriage plan, making it more susceptible to being challenged and overturned.
Divorce can be financially devastating, potentially erasing decades of wealth through legal fees and asset division. Therefore, choosing a life partner is not just an emotional decision but a crucial financial one. Ensuring financial compatibility and considering a prenuptial agreement are vital risk management strategies.
A prenup is not about distrusting a partner; it's about distrusting the government's one-size-fits-all divorce laws. It empowers a couple to create their own rules for a potential separation while they are still in love, ensuring a fairer outcome.