Success is often attributed not to a relentless personal grind, but to a superpower in attracting and retaining top talent. True scaling and outsized impact come from empowering a great team, embodying the idea that "greatness is in the agency of others."
True maturity isn't defined by age but by the creation of "surplus value." This is the point where you contribute more economic, emotional, and social value than you consume from your community and society. It marks the transition from a taker to a giver.
The crisis facing young men is fundamentally economic. Their declining viability as providers prevents family formation, a cornerstone of societal stability. This economic frustration leads to anger and radicalization, making the "lonely, broke young man" a uniquely destabilizing force in society.
Productive conversations about men's struggles are stifled by a societal "gag reflex." This is caused by the far-right co-opting the issue with regressive solutions and the far-left reframing it as men *being* the problem, leading to immediate accusations of misogyny.
A profound personal unlock involves shifting from a transactional, "scorecard" approach in relationships to an intentional one. Instead of tracking give-and-take, decide the kind of person you want to be (e.g., a generous partner) and hold yourself to that standard unilaterally. This fosters healthier connections.
While young men may be fans, it's their mothers who are the most effective supporters and advocates for addressing the issues facing them. Mothers see firsthand when their sons are struggling compared to their daughters, making them a powerful and credible cohort for advancing the conversation productively.
To combat the feeling of time accelerating with age, actively practice feeling. By consciously allowing yourself to weep at something moving or laugh out loud at something funny, you register moments more deeply. This slows down your perception of life and prevents you from merely ripping through it.
The ultimate purpose of achieving strength, wealth, and influence is to graduate from protecting oneself and one's family to protecting the wider community and even those you'll never meet. This selfless act of protection is described as "planting trees the shade of which you'll never sit under."
